This week we are closing our series of "The Men Who Hear Our Healing." This past month as mentioned before, has taught us a greater need to expand on this topic and we we will surely do so in the very near future!
This week I wanted to touch on HOW the men in our lives were encouraged to hear and support in the conversation about the women in their lives with a painful past.
Speaking for myself, getting close to anyone of the opposite sex was incredibly challenging and literally frightening for me. I was dealing with too much, and was left jaded from my experiences with abuse, toxic relationships that were a direct result from my experiences with sexual assault.
First and foremost, I had to deal with me... after much trial and error I realized that my healing would not met by man alone, my closure, was not going to be experienced without CHRIST. The route I took was everything I needed and more in terms of accepting, dealing, and HEALING from a past I continued to run from and ignore.
For years I made attempts to be in committed relationships with men to prove to myself I can TRUST again, I could LOVE again, and feel safe once again.
But my definition of love was allll the way wrong. If It didn't involve chaos, manipulation, abuse(emotional or physical), lack of commitment, jealously, etc. than in my eyes, it wasn't real.
My definition was formulated soon after I experienced the act of hate(rape) merge with God's creation of physical love through means of (intimacy) between man and woman. This blended into a lethal concoction I digested daily to the point I believed "this was as good as it got."
What I was really saying through my actions was "this as much as I loved myself."
Had I learned to begin redefining LOVE with ME...I wouldn't have entertained relationships with others with an unhealed version of myself.
"Had I started with me..."will be new series coming soon... and THIS is ultimately HOW I learned to love, (how I'm still learning), and how the KINGS in my life could hear me for who I am not simply all I've been through. This ushered in change and allowed the men in my life I hold close and dear to see themselves as a compliment to my healing not the root of it. --DevinMarie
Till next week, we are EXCITED to share, to learn to grow with you all!
Stay tuned, and thank you for rolling with us🙏🏽❤️👑
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